Wednesday, July 16, 2008

Rush Hour Children

Have you ever had that moment where you consider going home, downing a bottle of 151, Jack, Johnnie, or something along those lines, then getting out your kitchen shears, a butcher knife, some twist ties, and tying your own tubes???

I did. Last night on the way home, and AGAIN this morning while commuting to work. Why? Because once again I found myself stuck in a sealed metal tube with Bebe's Kids...

Last night I had the pleasure of sharing my bus ride home with Sir Screams A-Lot. As the bus pulled up this loud screeching could be heard. I along with others waiting to get on kept looking around trying to trace its origin (in my case so I could run/limp screaming in the other direction). It was only as I got on the bus that I realised the noise was coming out of the body of a small child standing (not sitting.. STANDING) in the seat in front. Useless mom was sitting next to him basically being very ineffective at quieting his screaching, and what I assumed to be older sis was sitting in the next seat taunting him and screaching as well... I really thought about WALKING the rest of the way home (about 15-20 looonnnngggg blocks). It was only the fact that I was horrendously tired and in pain that held me back. So I put on my iPod and turned the volume all the way up and prayed for a swift ride home.

This morning it was Little Esse-san [I love Katt Williams] on the train. HTF ("how" instead of "what") can you whine, fuss, kick, cry, etc. from Brooklyn, ALL THE WAY to Midtown Manhattan!?!?!?! I didn't know who I wanted to hurt more, the kid or again the useless and totally ineffective mom. Futher more why did the mom look, I don't know, scared of the child? Like she was loathe to say or do anything that would set the little pokeman spawn of satan off further!?!?! WTFF!!! So again I put my iPod on and blasted it (I will probably be hard of hearing in my old age).

All I know is that if I had dared to behave in such a manner as a child my mother would have put a serious hurting on me because there was no way she was going to let me embarass her in public.

I am not looking forward to the commute home this evening. The urge to shove evil kids in front of buses, trains, or any vehicle with sufficient speed to render them moot grows stronger everyday... what to do...

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