Wednesday, April 22, 2009

Happy Hump Day

Courtesy of one of my cousins. ENJOY!

In a hospital's Intensive Care Unit, patients always died in the
same bed, on Sunday morning, at about 11:00 am , regardless of their
medical condition This puzzled the doctors and some even thought it had
something to do with the super natural. No one could solve the mystery
as to why the deaths occurred around 11:00 am Sunday, so a worldwide
team of experts was assembled to investigate the cause of the incidents.
The next Sunday morning, a few minutes before 11:00 am all of the
doctors and nurses nervously waited outside the ward to see for
themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all about. Some were holding
wooden crosses, prayer books, and other holy objects to ward off the
evil spirits. Just when the clock struck 11:00 , Pookie Johnson, the
part-time Sunday sweeper , entered the ward and unplugged the life
support system so he could use the vacuum cleaner.

Still Having a Bad Day????

The average cost of rehabilitating a seal after the Exxon Valdez
Oil spill in Alaska was $80,000. At a special ceremony, two of the most
expensively saved animals were being released back into the wild amid
cheers and applause from onlookers. A minute later, in full view, a
killer whale ate them both.

Still think you are having a Bad Day????

A woman came home to find her husband in the kitchen shaking
frantically, almost in a dancing frenzy, with some kind of wire running
from his waist towards the electric kettle. Intending to jolt him away
from the deadly current, she whacked him with a handy plank of wood,
breaking his arm in two places. Up to that moment, he had been happily
listening to his Walkman.

Are Ya OK Now? - No?

Two animal rights defenders were protesting the cruelty of
sending pigs to a slaughterhouse in Bonn , Germany . Suddenly, all two
thousand pigs broke loose and escaped through a broken fence, stampeding
madly. The two helpless protesters were trampled to death.

What?!? STILL having a Bad Day????

Iraqi terrorist Khay Rahnajet didn't pay enough postage on a
letter bomb. It came back with 'Return to Sender' stamped on it.
Forgetting it was the bomb, he opened it and was blown to bits. God is

There now, Feeling Better!?

No comments: