In response to this
Actually, I like your friend's hair (I'm another co-worker). I just wanted to tell you that white girls are awful to each other, too. I have a friend who is always pointing out what she doesn't like about herself (she'll poke her stomach out like a Buddha and say how fat she is). I told her that I try to never point out what I consider to be a flaw because maybe someone else hasn't noticed it. Once you mention it, though, they won't forget it. We also diss on the girl with the latest clothes, hair, significant other, etc. My 15-year-old niece is already using the b-word to describe girls she doesn't like. So, unfortunately, I think it is women in general who are our worst enemies. And, the men in our lives will only live up to the expectations we set for ourselves.
September 30, 2008 4:38 PM
A very good point is made here which is that the woman on woman bashing crosses all cultural, racial, social, and ethnic planes. Yet it still raises the questions of HOW? and WHY?
How did we (the female gender collectively) end up this way?
There are many who would jump and say "it is the (inset appropriate colour reference here) man's fault", but really? Can men really be held responsible for how we see ourselves? for how we see each other? Honestly to me that is giving them far more credit than they deserve. How did we come from societies, cultures, and histories where the women were a strong, vital part of the family and community to where we are now?
We are we (the female gender collectively) this way?
Why are we so competitive with and judgemental of each other? What are we fighting for? Seriously. Again, the knee jerk reaction is to blame men, but at what point do we take responsiblity for ourselves and our actions? Just because men call us bitches and hoes doesn't mean that we have to. Realistically the "change" is not going to start with the men, it has to start with us.
As the nurturers of society (and frankly I see NOTHING wrong with that) it is the women who shape the minds of the future generations so if we really want to effect a change in the way women are viewed within sociatal and family structures, then we need to put up or shut up. We want our men to change, well teach our boys how to be real men. We want each other to change, well teach our girls how to be real ladies.
Change starts from within... time to get those mirrors out and start taking a good hard look...